Blog Posts

Fear

9/2/2019

Sweating, trembling, hot flushes or chills, shortness of breath or difficulty breathing, rapid heartbeat (tachycardia), pain or tightness in the chest, and a sensation of butterflies in the stomach are all symptoms of Fear. Fear-we [Humans] avoid fear when ever possible. We find ways around situations, thoughts, work, goals, and people that cause us fear. And for the most part [it] works. The caveat-Fear is ultimately unavoidable. We will be faced with Fear and we cannot avoid it! We either face it and destroy it or we run and hide. Fear keeps us from achieving goals, making more money, living the dream life, meeting the man/woman of our dreams, and the feeling of pride that we will experience when we reflect and see that Fear was faced and conquered. There is no feeling that can match the magnitude of the feeling of accomplishment.

Mimicking the road to a heathy fit body-the road to defeating Fear is tough and treacherous. To defeat Fear, you must Get Angry [Positive] and get sick of feeling afraid. Tell yourself that no matter what may come you will face it and deal with it! This isn’t sweet magic; one time is not going to work. You must put it in the work!

The difficult Part:
You must look deep into yourself and find one of many fears. Beat it about, grab it and drag it out. Then begin to dissect it. Each piece dissected must be examined. Ask yourself: Is this worth fearing? Where’s the evidence? How will I feel conquering this fear? What positive outcome will I gain by defeating this Fear? Answer honestly. After many practice sessions you will be ready to go to war with Fear and be Victorious!

Do this daily. If you can only do it for 5 minutes at a time, then do it! Get some time in each day. Just work your way up until you are ready to face and destroy [it]. When you feel ready to deal with it-be consistent no matter the highs and lows and soon you will be Victorious over the Fear. Now you are officially a Bad Ass!

I would love to work with you on this. Start a dialogue below and let witness the greatest change you will ever make in your life!

In my next Blog we will confront Doubt. Sign up for my newsletter and get it as soon as its published!

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Get Angry!

8/23/2019

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Anger is associated with a negative connotation. We are often warned “Try not to get angry”, “Being angry is not good for your health” “Anger leads to hate”, etc. etc. Anger, being one of our most primal and sophisticated emotions, can be used to our benefit. Coincidently speaking, all of our emotions can be used to our benefit. We are taught and groomed from an early age how to feel, act, react, and express ourselves cautiously with some emotions and negatively when dealing with stronger emotions. Emotions cannot be negative. Let me repeat that to hit it home-EMOTIONS CANNOT BE NEGATIVE! No matter the emotion-it is impossible for them to be negative. Our emotions are geared toward guiding us safely through life.

It was once believed that humans can experience six distinct emotions; Happiness, Sadness, Fear, Anger, Surprise, and Disgust. But a new study published in the Proceedings of National Academy of Sciences-led by Alan S. Cowen and Dacher Keltner PhD (1) -states that there are many human emotions: Admiration, Adoration, Aesthetic, Appreciation, Amusement, Anxiety, Anger, Awe, Awkwardness, Boredom, Calmness, Confusion, Craving, Disgust, Empathetic, pain, Entrancement, Envy, Excitement, Fear, Horror, Interest, Joy, Nostalgia, Sadness, Satisfaction, Sexual desire, and Sympathy. Whether you are old school and abide by the big 6, or a believer in the new list, they all serve to guide us through situations, issues, troubles, and life in general. Examples: If you experience Confusion it is a signal to step back and reassess the situation in order to provide clarity. If you are experiencing Fear it is a signal to decide to escape or to face the fear head on-destroy it and turn it into Satisfaction. (And just for clarity, escaping something or someone that causes you Fear could be facing it head on and dealing with it-in the case of an abusive spouse or violent circumstance.) Once you change your beliefs toward our human emotions and truly accept that there are no negative emotions, then you can start to use them to your advantage!

In this case we are addressing and using Anger. Not just Anger – POSITIVE ANGER. When we get Angry usually we express it negatively and externally using profanities and often being violent. We also turn it inwards; we bombard ourselves into self-deprecation and shut down and let the Anger stew and boil until it’s expressed in the former. Now let’s try something new. I want you to think of an aspect in your life that is lacking or you are frustrated with; this could be your career, your finances, your relationship, your health or your station in life [living in poverty or being held down by those who lead] and focus deeply on it/them. Now feel the emotion(s). What is/are the emotion(s) you are feeling? Is it Sadness, Disgust, Pain, Fear, Anger, all of them? If it happens to be Anger-you are halfway there. If it is a different emotion we need to turn that into Positive Anger. Do not turn away or deflect your attention from these emotions. Focus deep-feel them! Now slowly begin to remove the Fear, Sadness, Disgust, Pain and fill the voids with POSITIVE ANGER! This anger isn’t the antiquated expression, it is anger built on a foundation of “I’m Fed Up!” This anger is the motivator not your enemy and let’s face it when we are angry it feels Powerful! And it is Powerful! This Anger lights a fire within us and blossoms into excitement-passion, determination and POWER! USE THIS POWER! Get Sick and Tired of the circumstances that are holding you back from your true self and your successful, profitable, happy, fulfilled life AND TAKE ACTION!

TAKE ACTION!

This won’t happen overnight. I only deliver Truth and Openness-even if it hurts. I’m not here to promise you a smooth ride all the way to the end of a rainbow dancing with a fluffy cloud. This process is hard-like anything else worthwhile. You must work at this! If you stay committed, I guarantee that the positive Anger will ignite the fire within you and you will begin to make changes in your life for the better. You are not a victim of your circumstance! You are in control of your life, your destiny! Now get Angry and start making changes. I would love to work with you on this. Start a dialogue below and let witness the greatest change you will ever make in your life!

Ø In my next Blog we will confront Fear in all its hellish glory!
·         Socrates concludes that the vices we associate with the emotion of fear — cowardice, but also shameful boldness and
   madness — are all explicable in terms of ignorance of what is and is not to be feared (Protagoras 360b4 ‑c7).

(1)   “27 Human Emotions: Forbes.” Forbes magazine: National Academy of Sciences: Alan S. Cowen and Dacher Keltner
PhD-https://www.forbes.com/sites/brucelee/2017/09/09/here-are-the-27-different-human-emotions-according-to-a-
   study/#147dd84f1335

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Why I Do What I Do

8/11/2019

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Financial decimation and reduction in the city’s police force were the causes of 1970’s New York becoming one of the most violent, impoverished, impecunious and mournful cities of the 20th century. Amid all of this I was placed into this world unknowing of my environment. I grew up poverty stricken. Electricity and gas were a blessing. Many days the apartment was dark and lacking sound. I had to grow up fast. The city demanded it. If a person didn’t grow up quick and learn how to deal with and navigate the streets, they would fall victim.

At age eight I was the “bag boy” for drug dealers. I would pick up a brown bag from one location and bring it to another. I would also sit on a stoop with a bag full of nickel and dime bags of various drugs. A customer would approach the dealer, across the street from where I sat, and hand him the money. The dealer would then signal to me as to what and how much I would distribute. I loved this because it made me feel accepted by the streets. My desire to know and experience more of this environment got me caught up in some dicey situations.

My desire and never-ending curiosity led me to explore the city. This caused me to end up in scary circumstances. Once a friend and I were lured into a basement apartment with the promise of money and sexually molested by a man. This wasn’t my only experience with sexual abuse. A family friend had his turn and five teenage girls had their way with my 8-year-old body. I never spoke of these horrendous events – feeling guilt ridden.
What follows is a life of drug addiction, violence, abuse, prostitution, incarceration, self-mutilation, sexual promiscuity and countless suicide attempts. This life became my destiny. I was not going to live past the age of 35.

The addiction, violence, abuse, prostitution, incarceration, cutting, sexual promiscuity and suicide attempts made me what I am today. I GOT ANGRY!! - Angry at what my life had become – what my life was going to be. I got angry at myself for wasting what I knew was talent, charm, intelligence and creativity within me. I channeled this anger and changed my life for the better.

Through this I discovered my calling. My calling is to help as many people who suffer as I have . Help them to find their way; their way back to who they truly are. My desire is my calling. I desire to save as many of my brothers and sisters as I can.
If I don’t embrace my calling; if I sit by and let others suffer; if I retreat into the life I once lived, then all my suffering, sadness and pain of my past will all be for nothing.

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